The piece that I am going to write got me thinking very deeply and question my behavior with all my male friends till date.
I met my friend Ishrat (name changed) at my workplace last Monday as usual. She was not her usual self and appeared troubled. After some girly eye contacts, she revealed to me that she wanted to tell something to all the girls in our lab in private. We were all very curious and eager to know as to what the matter was.
“Have you ever touched any of your male friends in a normal conversation like a pat or something?? Well, if you have than from today DON’T!! You may take it as my order/request as per your convenience but don’t.” We were really confused at what she was trying to get at so we all pestered her for details. She said, “You all remember right that I was meeting my old friend, Akhtar (name changed) on Friday evening?” We all nodded. She continued, “We both were sitting by the lake and I playfully put my hand over his eyes saying “don’t look at me like that…nazar lag jayegi.” And once I patted his cheek. Suddenly, he grabbed both my hands and said, “Ishrat, come close to me and let me kiss you!!” Ishrat got a very shocked audience at the completion of this sentence. “Then?” inquired Sungandhi (name changed).
“I asked him what was wrong? How can he suddenly say something like that. He was shaking and sweating profusely. But all he kept saying please let me do something to you…please. But obviously, I didn’t let him do anything. He just kept walking, sitting and cupping his hands. Finally at around 1:30 am he told me “lets go back to our respective hostels. I will drop you and don’t call me; I will call you.” “And I came back,” Ishrat concluded. “But what happened to him suddenly? Did he like you or something?” I asked.
“No, in fact he is engaged,” Isharat said, “but he called me on Sunday evening and said he wanted to meet and explain. So we met and the first thing he said was “I am sorry Ishrat. This shouldn’t have happened. Please forgive me.” I told him I wanted to know what had happened. He said, “Yaar, tu apne haatho me kya lagake aai thi. Jab tune mujhe chhoowa mai ignite ho gaya. I couldn’t control myself.”” “What happened when you just touch him?” Sugandhi asked. “I don’t know but he says it’s not only him. It happens to all boys when girls touch them; though there is variation in touch. A slap can’t be arousing obviously; but a casual tousle, a pat, a peekaboo kind of touch – everything can be arousing! He told me that when a guy who is friend touches a girl casually, the girl doesn’t really feel or think anything wrong. But that act gives satiety and pleasure to guys. Its like electricity!!!” she replied, with wide eyes. “But of course, the environment is also a contributing factor, isn’t it?” asked my senior, Radha (name changed),” You guys were alone, it was drizzling.” “Well, 2+2 makes 4, didi. My touch + the weather ignited Akhtar,” replied Ishrat.
So, this whole incident got me thinking: As a girl, now I have to keep my hands in control too in addition to my conduct and dress. My normal friendly behavior can arouse any guy even if he is my best friend. Is it true whatever that Akhtar guy said? Do we arouse guys all around us on a daily basis?
I am open to any comments and views on this.